How to Ace a Job Interview (5 Easy Steps)

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It’s happy hour. You’ve just downed your third beer and you get the phone call! The company you’ve dreamed of working for has asked that you come in for a job interview! Now it’s REALLY Happy Hour! You can’t suppress your excitement! But then it slowly sinks in that you’ll have to be interrogated by a team that may dislike you before you are guaranteed the job. Your happiness quickly turns to fear and now you don’t know what to do. But worry not, this easy-to-follow guide will help you ace ANY job interview.

1. Time is on your Side!

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William Shakespeare wisely stated that “[A person is] Better three hours too soon than 1 minute too late.” While I don’t suggest getting to your interview three hours early, I do want to stress how important timeliness is. You need to create a good impression with your prospective boss, and prove that you care about getting to work on time. For this reason, I recommend taking an Uber or Taxi to your interview. If you drive, you risk being pulled over and receiving a DUI if you are a day drinker. If this happens, you’ll miss your interview all together!

2. So Fresh and So Clean

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Nothing’s worse than a hangover…except a hangover on the day of your big job interview! If you’ve got all the telltale signs of a night of binge drinking (headache, vomiting), then do yourself a favor and take a shot. The ‘hair of the dog’ technique helps ease hangover symptoms and will get you feeling fresh and ready to talk shop with your prospective employer.

3. Don’t Let the Board Room Become a Shake Shack

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If you’re like me and suffer from alcoholism, you know the awful feelings bought on by withdrawal. One of the most obvious symptoms to outsiders are the shakes. If you step into the interview without having your morning drink and are shakey, they will suspect you of being an alcoholic and deny you the job. On top of that you’ll be feeling nervous, irritable and uncomofrtable. It is best to take prophylactic measures and drink just before the interview to avoid the shakes. If you’re concerned about the smell of alcohol on your breath, chew on a mint or say that you’ve been using a rather strong mouthwash.

4. The Trouble With Job History

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Most people who are looking for new jobs were fired from their previous jobs. Often, this is because of alcoholism. People who drink a lot tend to miss out on work from being frequently hungover. They need to maintain a job in order to get the money to buy more drinks, but they have a hard time keeping at it. When the subject of your previous employers comes up during the interview, make sure to lie and claim that you left of your own volition because the position wasn’t challenging enough. If they like you and ask for references, provide the phone number of a friend or relative to claim they were your employer and give you a dazzling, 5 star reference!

5. Easing Nervous Tension

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Don’t become distressed at the prospect of not having alcohol by your side during the interview. Typically, these meetings last only an hour. You can nip at the mini bottle of Jack in your jacket pocket in the bathroom right after the interview ends.
When your interview gets to casual talk about your life and hobbies, avoid mentioning alcohol or binge drinking. Just talk about other things you’re interested in. If they confront you about your drinking, deny the extent of your abuse and claim that you only have 1-2 drinks per day.
Follow these 5 steps and you stand to ace the interview, and get the job of your dreams!

5 Steps to Finding Love and Maintaining a Healthy Relationship

5 Steps to Finding Love and Maintaining a Healthy Relationship

By Dr. Wilford Samuelson, PhD

“All You Need Is Love” as the Beatles famously stated in their hit song of the same name. This song is both popular and the defacto credo of the human race. Everyone wants to be loved in various ways. Platonic, familial and romantic are the three types of loves most people hope to achieve. Family and platonic loves are simple because you’re born with family, and unless you have a bad family the love will be automatic. But how can one achieve romantic love, which unlike familial love may involve physical and sexual experiences? Read this guide to find the 5 steps you must take to find and maintain Romantic Love!

Step 1: Find a Partner

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In order to be in a romantic relationship, you must first find a partner who agrees to be with you. This is often a person of the opposite sex, but if you are gay it could be someone of the same sex. Finding that special someone is not easy! There are many people who are very ugly that you would not want to be with. On top of that, some people that you find hot may not think you are attractive. And even if you do find someone that you share a mutual attraction with, they might have other bad qualities, such as being criminals, or very boring. It is very tricky and hard to find the right person, but luckily computer technology has made it much simpler, through dating apps like OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, Bumble and Tinder. These sites allow you to see pictures of the person to see if they’re hot. That way you will already know if you think they’re hot when you meet them. It also shows you some of their interests and things about them, so you get to know their personality and find out if they are a good or bad person.

Step 2: Find Your Pleasure Points

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One part of many happy relationships is physical (sexual) activity between two people, as opposed to just one person masturbating. But finding the best way to have good (or hopefully great) sex with your partner can be difficult. Being overweight, having erectile dysfunction or being dirty and having bad hygiene can all play a role in making it even more difficult to turn on your partner.
The best thing you can do is to make the mood hot and steamy with some pornography. If you don’t already have one, purchase a flat screen TV and put it in your bedroom. When you are ready to have sex with your partner, play the porno. That way if your partner is not hot, or you don’t like them, you can still be turned on by the pornographic actors.

Step 3: Quality Time

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When it comes to love, the time spent together is about quality, not quantity. In other words, if you can only spend one GREAT hour with your partner in a month, that’s much better than spending 3 hours with your partner that are boring and not good. Find things you both love to do together. This can include anything from boating, to sailing, snorkeling or going to the park. Use your imagination. Experiment to find the perfect together-time activities. Many couples love going to the movies and sharing a bucket of popcorn over a romantic comedy. Other couples who are music-lovers enjoy attending concerts. Many gay couples enjoy going to gay bars, or watching gay films.

Step 4: Protect Your Partner from Competition

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One of the toughest parts about staying together is making sure your partner is not exposed to other people who are better than you. If this happens they may leave you for the other person, and you’ll have to start over again. But it’s difficult to keep a watchful eye over your partner when they have a job or attend school and leave the house for hours at a time. It is best to encourage them to find a job where they can work from home so that you can always make sure they are locked inside and when they do want to leave you can go with them.

Step 5: Break Up to Make Up

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If, in the unfortunate event that your partner is no longer hot, or is a bad person, you must break up, that’s ok. There are Plenty of Fish in the ocean (and on PlentyOfFish.com). Find another person who better suits your tastes. Breaking up is not easy, but it’s easier than maintaining a relationship with someone who is fat, unattractive or weird. “Nip it at the bud” to borrow a phrase from gardening. If you decide you didn’t want to break up, you can always get back together with that person later, if they still like you.

How To Start a Law Firm

How to Start a Law Firm

by James Prescott, Esq.

Building the Firm You Were Born to Build

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Have you always wanted to be in charge of your own team of high-powered lawyers? Do you want to see your name in law firm advertisements? Well today is your lucky day. This easy guide to creating a law firm is for both burgeoning law enthusiasts as well as experienced lawyers.

1. Law Degree

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The first step to starting a law firm is to get a law degree. If you’ve already got a law degree, you can move on to the next step.
Before starting a high-powered law firm, you’ll need to become a lawyer, which requires getting a degree in law. There are hundreds of great law schools to choose from, but which one is right for you? I recommend Temple University in Philadelphia, PA or Harvard Law School near Boston, Massachusetts. But any law school will do the trick.
Law school takes approximately 3 years and is alot of work! Once you finish it you’ll need to pass the BAR exam as well. I know you’re thinking that this is going to be overwhelmingly difficult, but fear not. It will all be worth it in the end, when your law firm gets off the ground.

2. Location, Location, Location

Once you are a lawyer, you are well on your way to starting the law firm of your dreams. You went through the hassle of law school, and now it’s time to start putting your name in lights. But you can’t build a law firm just anywhere! Choose the hottest area in your city or town to build your credentials. Potential customers will be turned off if your law firm is in a boring or non-descript location.
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Find the trendiest, and most unique part of your town to buy up property in. So for example, if I were a New Yorker, I’d try to build my law firm in Times Square. It is a high-traffic area and makes your firm very visible to thousands of people every day, many of whom will need legal services at some point in their lives.
You can start preparing for this step while you’re still in law school. Take walks to your ideal law firm location and keep an eye out for “For Sale” signs on any buildings.

3. Money Management

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Creating a law firm isn’t cheap. Between the costs of licensing, fees, certifications law school tuition and other random costs, making your dream a reality can cost a pretty penny. But worry not. Now that you’re a lawyer, you can take on some easy cases as you start to get your law firm together, just to save up some extra money.
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If you’d like to make a little more on nights or weekends, why not try driving for Uber or Lyft? It’s a great way to make some extra income in your spare time.

4. Cultivate Your Dream Team

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Your law firm, while it may have your name on it, is not just about you. Law firms are comprised of teams of great lawyers. Start building that team now. Start with some of your law school colleagues who have passed the BAR. You know off the bat that they are good lawyers.
Be social: when you are at public events and gatherings ask around for who the lawyers are in the room. If you meet someone that you think has what it takes to be part of your law firm, ask them to join.
Another powerful tool is social media. Go on LinkedIn and find lawyers on there. On Facebook, search for friends who have “Lawyer” listed on their Intro tab.

5. All Press is Good Press

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People find the lawyers they love through word-of-mouth. But how can your firm get a word-of-mouth reputation without much experience under your belt? The answer is simple: take on a high-profile case pro bono (in legal terms, that means free of charge to the client). Stay abreast of current events. Look in the local newspaper for criminal cases involving heinous violence or sex, and try to reach out to the perpetrators. If you know any celebrities caught up in criminal activities, ask to represent them. It’s worth a shot. And if you offer to do it pro bono, your chances are even greater.
Conclusion
Starting a law firm is no walk in the park. But using this guide, it just got a whole lot easier to start building the law firm of your dreams.

CKY Guitars, Guitar Pedals, Amps and more!

Ever wanted to know what kind of guitar pedals CKY’s Chad I. Ginsburg uses?

Check out this very cool video to see his whole rig! From the guitars, pedals, amps and more! Find out how you can sound like the CKY band!

 





















How to Make Canadian Thanksgiving Dinner with Dollar Store Ingredients!

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year




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It’s that time of year again! The second Monday of October is right around the corner, and that means it’s time for Canadian Thanksgiving, or Action de grâce as it’s called in Quebec. But who can deal with the hassle, stress and cost of a full Canadian Thanksgiving dinner?

This stress-free, easy guide will show you how to prepare an entire Canadian Thanksgiving feast using ingredients purchased exclusively at the Dollar Store. Feed your entire family for under $10 CAD and stay free from stress. People from provinces across the nation of Canada, from Manitoba to British Columbia will love these Great Canadian Dollar Store variations on Canadian classics! Don’t waste your hard earned paycheck on a hefty grocer’s bill from Loblaw’s…eat fresh, healthy and deliciously with these simple Great Canadian Dollar Store ingredients.


Stuffing

What Canadian Thanksgiving would be complete without a hot, piping pile of Stuffing? This Canadian Thanksgiving treat is made from old scraps of bread. But who has time to collect and cultivate old bread, chop up aged loaves and deal with the messy crumbs and cost prohibitive sauces and spices?

Here’s the easy dollar store solution!

Instead of chopping up old bread, why not use pre-chopped and aged breadcrumbs?

They are essentially the same thing as old bread chunks, but in a miniaturized version.

Take your breadcrumbs, dump them in a pan and pour in a container of Armour Vienna Sausages

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These Sausage Bites are floating in Chicken Broth, which is an essential Stuffing Ingredient. The Yummy wieners will also spice up this Canadian Thanksgiving Classic. Traditionally, Stuffing calls for Onions and Celery. Why waste your time and money on fresh onions and celery, when you can buy Onion Powder  and dump it right on?

The celery is a bit trickier. You will have to buy a can of Chicken Soup, and pull out the celery bits to add to the Stuffing. Many people (like myself) cannot stand the taste of celery, so I’ll skip this part. But if you do like Celery in Your Canadian Thanksgiving Stuffing, just grab a can of Healthy Choice Chicken with Rice Soup, pick out the pre-cooked Celery Chunks and sprinkle them on.

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Now pre-heat your oven to 190 Celsius, bake for 35 minutes and voila! Canadian Thanksgiving Stuffing that’s just as good, if not better, than what you’d make using traditional ingredients, and at $4, who can beat it?

What You’ll Need

-1 package Seasoned Breadcrumbs

-1 can vienna sausages

-1 2 oz container onion powder

-1 can Chicken with Rice Soup (for celery) Optional

Directions

Pre-Heat Oven to 190 Celsius. DUmp all ingredients in pan. If celery is desired, pick from Chicken Soup can. Put in oven for 35 mintues.


Jellied Cranberry Sauce

My family can’t get enough of the traditional Canadian style Jellied Cranberry sauce.  Nothing says Canadian Thanksgiving like a dollop of the Jellied Cran next to a steaming and fresh Turkey leg. Canada, in fact, is the world’s second-largest producer of this tart red fruit. But Jellying at home can be a nightmare. And unless you can afford to take time off work to travel to the annual Ontario Cranberry Harvest, good luck picking your own!  Us Canucks love Cranberries so much that I’ve been to farms far too many times that have been picked clean, with not a single berry on the bush!

Luckily there’s no need to do all of that time consuming, expensive and DANGEROUS home jellying. Simply grab a can of Ruby Kist Jellied Cranberry Sauce. It tastes just like Grandma’s Canadian Jellied Sauces, but at this price point and convenience level, who can turn it down?




Turkey

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Turkey is the  pièce de résistance, as the Québécois might call it, to any Canadian Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, Turkey is a bird that costs a pretty penny at Loblaw’s, and is not affordable on a budget. 

So instead of buying one, why not hunt a wild turkey? Turkeys can be found milling about in the woods of eastern Ontario, southern Quebec and the southern-most parts of the four western provinces. So grab your shotgun and hitch a VIA Rail to one of those regions. Once you’ve made your kill, use these Dollar Store scissors (or ciseaux in Quebec) to cut all the feathers off of the bird.

 

Your Turkey should look just like  a store-bought one now! AS long as you cut off the head and the feathers it will look like a clean grocery store One!

Now, empty out the organs and throw them in the trash can. Grab a Large Rectangular Foil Roaster Pan from the Dollar Store and toss the bird in.

Pre-heat your over to 200 Celsius and cook it for about 5 hours. If it’s too dry, Add Dollar Store Crystal Geyser Natural Alpine Spring Water to the pan to get the bird more wet and taste more juicy.



All DOne!
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And there you have it! A delicious and traditional Canadian Thanksgiving meal for under $10 CAD.


How to Sound Like Tool using guitars and guitar pedals

Tool Time

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So, you want to achieve the sound of Tool on guitar? It’s not an easy thing to do, but with this guide you can achieve those sounds of guitarist Adam Jones more easily than you could before. The Tool band featuring Maynard and others was well-loved by many adoring fans who thought they made good music. Their long, long songs were scary and they had dark nightmare themes in their music videos, such as the one that was claymation. They made dark music in the tradition of other great bands like Marilyn Manson, Ozzy Osbourne and Slipknot.

Guitar Tips n’ Tricks

Adam Jones of the Tool band uses many different very cool but very expensive guitars. Adam uses Gibson Les Paul guitars and Gibson SG guitars which are quite nice.

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However there’s no way the guitarist on a budget could afford such guitars. However, there’s no need to worry! All guitars sound the same, and the main difference is just in how they look. So why not go for the  Crescent MG38-CF 38″ Acoustic Guitar Starter Package?




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At only $36.95 it has everything you need to get the TOOl sound, including a Crescent Digital E-Tuner so that you can keep the guitar in tune while playing such Tool songs as Schism and Stinkfist.

Amp

Adam Jones use many big, heavy amps which are too heavy for the budget guitarist. Marshall heads, Sunn Heads and Mesa Boogies are just the beginning of all the big heavy amps he uses. While these amps are very cool, and great for achieving rock sounds, they weigh quite alot and cost even more. For the guitarist on a budget, I recommend the Barcelona 10 Watt Amp



Barcelona 10 Watt Electric Guitar Combo Amp

It has everything you’d ever need to achieve a Tool sound, such as Volume knob, treble Knob and Bass knob. And at the low cheap cost of $39.99 it’s a no brainer to buy this one!

 

Pedal

Adam Jones uses a plethora of rock effects to achieve his rock sounds. From Phasers, Flangers, Delays, Wahs and more! He even uses a talkbox, like Peter Frampton did in the olden days. BUt how can you achieve these essential tones on a budget? If you bought all the pedals Adam had they could cost up to $500 which is too much money.



Caline USA CP-32 Clear Veil PINK Overdrive Fuzz Guitar Effect Pedal

I reccomend the Caline USA CP-32 Clear Veil PINK Overdrive Fuzz Guitar Effect Pedal. At $29, it gives you everything you need to achieve a rock sound, which Tool would use. It has a very nice Pink color.

Additional Tools

Adam Jones been rated the 75th Greatest Guitarist of all time by the Rolling Stone. This is no easy feat. If you want to get the tone of Rock Legends it is reccomended that you subscribe to Rolling STone (not to be confused with the band of the same name).

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Do your research by reeading Rolling Stone to fiure out what maeks the rock music you love great!

Conclusion

Sounding like Tool and Adam Jones is not easy, but with this guide it just got a whole lot easier!


How to Sound like Weezer using pedals (on a budget)

Emo Music Band

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So you want to be the bigshot and sound like Weezer, the Emo band? Doing so is not as easy as you think. Guitarist River Como, Guitarist Brian Bell and Bassist Scott Shriner are musicians  and achieving their guitar and bass tones is not an easy task, however this article will show the musician on a budget how you can achieve their tones.

Guitar

If you want to play songs such as Hashpipe or others, the first step is the guitars. Even though they are not that famous or good, The members of the Weezer are very wealthy from their success and can afford all of the most expensive instruments ever made. River and Brian play very expensive guitars from Fender and Gibson, which are too expensive to afford. Scott Shriner plays basses from Fender and Gibson, which are also incredibly expensive and not realistic to purchase.



But don’t worry. The truth is that all guitars sound exactly the same. The only difference is in their looks. Instead of a Gibson or Fender, why not try out this Davison Black Guitar from Amazon? It is great for achieving emo-style Weezer tones, and has a great color and look.

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It is a very cool looking instrument and sounds great. If you decide you’d want to play bass like Scott Shriner, just tune the strings down to the bass notes using the included tuning pipe.

Amps

The Davison Black Guitar includes a carrying bag, and also an amp.

The Weezer people play very heavy expensive amps such as Marshall, Sunn and more. These are too big, loud and heavy for the budget guitarist. The included 5w amp with the Davison sounds just as good, and for the cheap low price it’s offered at  and the low weight it weighs, how can you beat it?




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Pedal Papas

Weezer people are known to play many expensive pedals. River plays the Rat distortion and Crybaby Wah. Brian Bell plays the Ibanez Tube Screamer and EHX Holy Grail. Scott Shriner plays the Voodoo Labs Power Supply.

These are all very expensive pedals that will cost an arm and a leg to purchase. Luckily there are other options, such as the  ammoon PockRock Guitar Multi-effects Processor. It costs $32.99 and is basically just Weezer sounds in a box, and many of them, including distortion (rock sound) and modulation (other sounds) and delay (echo sounds).

It also includes a built in drum machine, which will play the Weezer-style beats so you don’t need a drummer.


Add-Ons

The rockers in  Weezer are getting old, so they probably snore and have Sleep Apnea. For this reason, it’s reccomended that you get a CPAP machine, to feel more like them. The name Weezer is most likely related to the Wheezing affliction associated with those that suffer from Sleep Apnea.

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Why not try this Philips Respironics Dream Station? It is a great entry level CPAP and paid for by most reputable insurance companies.

Conclusion

Sounding like Weezer is no easy task, but using this guide, it just got a whole lot easier.

How to Sound like Phish using Guitars and Pedals (Without Breaking the Bank)

Big Phish to Fry

So you want to be a big-shot and achieve tone like Trey Anastasio from the Phish band? That’s no easy task! Every Phan wants to be like Trey and achieve his level of tone. With his extensive array of rare and custom guitars, pedals and amps, purchasing all of Trey’s gear could cost hundreds of dollars or more! For the guitarist and Phish or jam enthusiast on a budget this is too hefty a load of money to spend. So how can you sound like Phish and Trey for cheaper? Read on to find out!


Phish-Sticks

The guitars Trey uses are known as Phish Sticks because of their long shape and the fact that they are being used by the Phish band. It is a pun on Fishsticks, the popular meal for children. Many of Trey’s Phish Sticks are custom made, meaning a wood builder puts it together for him specially, meaning it’s a very rare and one-of-a-kind item. So even if you wanted to buy a specific Phish Stick, it’s would not be possible. The good news is that all guitars sound the same. For the guitarist on a budget, I reccomend the Davison black guitar.



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It looks cool, and has all the great rock and Phish energy of a more expensive guitar. 



 

Phish Tank

Amps, or Phish Tanks, as they’re called in the Phish community, are the big black boxes that transmit the sound of the electric guitar out into the audience. They have a square or rectangular shape, much like a Fish Tank, so it’s a pun, much like Phish Stick. For doing a very big shows at places like Madison Square Garden, Trey needs very big Phish Tanks to make this happen.

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Trey uses very big expensive amps, such as a Fender Deluxe Reverb 65 and a  Swart ST-6V6se Space Tone Tube Amplifier. These are too expensive for the guitarist on a budget. Instead why not use the Mooer Little Tank D15?

It has Tank in the name, so it truly deserves the honor of being a Phish Tank. And for the low price it’s being offered for on Amazon, how could you refuse that item? Also it’s a littler one that what Trey has so it will be easy to carry around.


Trey’s Pedal

Trey Anastasio, the guitarist of Phish, is known to use a plethora of pedals. His dazzling array of pedals includes a Tube Screamer, a Whammy, a Ross Compressor and a tuner. THese are all very rare and expensive to purchase or own so doing that on a budget would be impossible.

 

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Why not instead go for the  ammoon PockRock Guitar Multi-effects Processor Effect Pedal 15 Effect Types 40 Drum Rhythms Tuning Function with Power Adapter Not only will it provide you with many guitar effects to help achieve the Phish tone, it also features a Drum Machine which can be used to create John FIshman style beats



 

Conclusion

Sounding like Phish aint easy. But it just got a whole lot easier with this guide.

How to Quit Vaping

Efortless Ecstacy: The Simple and Easy One-Step Solution to Quit Vaping for Good
by James Franko

Introduction:

I was 31 years old and found myself tossing another empty 30ml bottle of Pina Colada vape juice into the waste bin. I heard the glass ‘clink’ as it hit the other 18 bottles in that bin. I hadn’t eaten in 2 weeks, because I couldn’t afford it. I needed the money to support my vape habit. Just 6 years earlier I could never have imagined myself in this position; destitute, skin and bones, endlessly suckling on a machine, and trying to evade the debt collectors because I hadn’t paid the insurance company for my recent plastic surgery operation. I knew this needed to stop. If only I had known then what I know now! I am 32 now and five months vape free! And in spite of everything I was told, it was EASY and SIMPLE! Quitting Vaping does not need to be the painful ordeal you think it is. Anyone can do it. Stop being a slave to your wick and coil! Learn how to live again, and be truly free. Read on to find out how.



 

Chapter 1:
Stubble, Rubble, Coil and Trouble

Before I tell you how you can quit vaping painlessly, I want to let you know that you have to quit for YOU. Not for me, or anyone else. Maybe you think Vaping is healthy, cool, a social lubricant or just a fun hobby. This is all social conditioning. Society has generated an image of Vape users as being part of an elite group, the cool and “in” crowd. The reality of being a chronic vape user couldn’t be further from the truth. Hollywood continues to propagate this dangerous stereotype by casting lead actors who Vape and include images of action heroes vaping in every hit film.

The music industry does the same, with nearly every rock n’ roller and rapper vaping up a storm in their music videos and live concert appearances. But beware friends—these performers are suffering far more than you think. Vaping is not a hobby or even a ‘bad habit.’ It is an addiction, plain and simple. Vaping addiction can be broken down into 4 primary stages.

The first is Stubble. You get so caught up in your vaping habit that you find yourself forgetting to shave. Your appearance is unkempt because you are focusing more on finding the right flavor e-juice with the appropriate VG/PG ratio. Step 2 is Rubble. You will look around and see that your life is beginning to fall apart because of that damned e-pen. All that’s left of your life and relationships will be the rubble that’s left behind. The note from your ex-wife telling you she’s left. Your daughter’s used diapers months after she’s been taken away by DHS. And all because you were lost in the clouds. Step 3 is Coil. Because a vape operates with a coil and a wick. After the Rubble stage is over, you will become even more immersed in your pipe, and will need to change your vape coil repeatedly. Step 4 is Trouble. You have run out of money and resources to supplement your vape habit and find yourself homeless, imprisoned or dead on the street.
I urge you, dear reader, to stop before it’s too late! You may be in the Stubble phase now, but for god’s sake don’t let it get to the Rubble Stage!


Chapter 2:
Let Go!


The vaping industry has you trapped. Trapped into thinking vaping is fun, trapped into thinking that the selection of flavors, from bubble gum to blueberry, are benign and benevolent…when in fact they are practical poison. The worst part is that the Vaping industry wants you to believe that quitting is difficult. Because when you think it’s difficult, you won’t make the effort. The fact of the matter is that quitting vaping is not only the best decision you’ll ever make in your life, it’s also easy and simple. With my one-step program you will no longer have to fear the 4 Phases of Vape Addiction: Stubble, Rubble, Coil and Trouble.

And even if you are trapped in the most grisly and nefarious stage, you can still opt out. It’s never too late! I’ve been counseling vape users to quit for over 4 months and have heard every excuse there is. “Vaping relaxes me!”…”It takes the edge off after a hard day”….”Just a few puffs on my vape when I wake up help get the day going”…”I’m just an addict I’ll never be able to quit.” These are all irrational fears and they are not rooted in reality. Let go of these fears. The vape juice has no power over you. Think about your friends who don’t vape, who aren’t troubled by second degree burns on their legs from unwieldy atomizers going off in their pockets. Think about your friends who don’t vape and don’t have to carry a backpack full of chargers, replacement coils and e-juice flavors with them at all times.

Think about your friends who don’t have oil stains on all their clothes from a faulty wick spurting e-juice everywhere. You’ve convinced yourself that you enjoy conversing with the vape store clerk who has tattoos on his face and double fists Monster Energy Drink and a custom modded battery. But the reality is that no one likes those people. When we give up vaping, we need to realize that we are giving up absolutely nothing, except for burden, stress and toil. Don’t think of quitting vaping as a sacrifice. Think of it as a new beginning, one in which you are truly free and not a servant to that despicable coil and wick. Read on to find out the one simple step you can take to cure yourself of the vaping disease.

Chapter 3:
The Pinky and the Brain


There are two body parts that effect and trigger the reward stimulus in the human body. Those two parts are the pinky and the brain. This is why vaping is so dangerously addictive. Because vape pens are operated using the pinky finger as a release, vaping over time creates neural pathways that the body interprets as being healthy and reward-giving. Vaping fools the body into thinking poison is nutritious. That’s a hard pill to swallow, but it’s the truth.


Chapter 4:
The Truth Serum


Suppose someone asked you why you vape. How would you respond? A typical response from a vaping addict is “I like it.” or “It’s cool.” or “It saves me money and helps me quit smoking.”

Now suppose you were forced to take a truth serum, that allowed you to see through both the literal and metaphoric clouds. When on the serum, you would have no choice but tell the 100% truth at all times. My guess is that your answer would be much different. Why do you vape? “Because I am unhappy with who I am as a person.” “Because society expects me to.” “Because I have never been loved.”

While painful, these truths represent the core reasons we vape. And these are certainly not easy things to overcome! In our adult life it is close to impossible to overcome these difficult and very real emotions. Vaping is not a cure for these pains, and in many cases it makes you feel worse about these very same issues. If 15 years ago someone told you that you’d have an insatiable desire to suckle upon a machine all day long so that you could feel worse about yourself and pay out the behind to do it, would you have believed them? OF COURSE NOT!

No one wants to vape, we just convince ourselves that we do to cover up other less visible scars. But this isn’t like using a band-aid on a flesh wound…it’s like spraying HIV infected blood and feces into a flesh wound. I don’t want to make you afraid, because there’s a solution.. It’s not too late! My simple one step program will help you quit vaping now.


Chapter 5:
September 11th, 2001


When talking about the denial we experience in regards to vaping, I like to use the analogy of one of the darkest days in recent American history: the attacks on the World Trade Center that occurred on September 11th, 2001 (I think you’ll find it interesting to note that the first electronic cigarette was developed by a Chinese pharmacist in 2001). You find every reason in the world to keep vaping, and don’t want to acknowledge that you are quite literally killing yourself. Or maybe you do know of the harm you’re causing but you justify it in your mind. “Tomorrow there could be another 9/11 and I’ll just die anyway! What’s the point in giving up something I love if a terrorist is just going to kill me anyway?”

The fact is that the chances of dying in a terrorist attack are very low. But the chances of dying from the long term effects of vaping are extremely high! Over 40,000,000 Americans die from vaping related ailments every year. To put that in perspective, that’s like having a 9/11 every 4 hours, 365 days a year. You thought 9/11 was tragic, and indeed it was, but you’re terrorizing your body with every puff and creating a mini 9/11 for your friends and family when they have to lay to rest at age 43. But keep vaping proudly…heck, why not have an open-casket funeral, vape pen in hand?


Chapter 6:
The Myth of Physical Withdrawal


In my four months of counseling vaping addicts, I’ve found the most common misconception to be that the physical withdrawal will be unbearable and in the sick mind of the vaping addict this is therefore a great reason not to quit. While a traditional cold-turkey quit can be quite painful, my unique one step program will bypass any and all withdrawal symptoms. Besides, the physical withdrawal we experience from nicotine is mild at best. After all, we go to sleep every night for 8 hours without any nicotine.

What we are actually addicted to is the suckling sensation, and this is tied to our broken relationship with our mothers, who feed us breast milk as children. We desire suckling on her ample teet, and unknowingly use a vape pen to experience this very same thing. “I was never breast fed as a child so that’s not my situation!” is what many readers are probably thinking. However, your life experience is not the reason for this behavioral trait. Thousands of years of human evolution, along with the experiences of our cro magnon ancestors have led to these intrinsic desires. If you don’t believe me, call your mother (if she is still alive) and ask to suckle upon her breast. I guarantee that once you do, you will not be desiring a hit off your vape for at least a few hours.

“Well why not just tell people to suckle their mother’s breast to quit vaping?” While this is a workable solution, I find that it puts a terrible strain on the mothers, who have their own lives to lead. In addition to that, some people have dead or ailing mothers, or don’t like being around their mothers. I have seen 3-5% of my patients use this technique successfully but it absolutely depends on having the right mother, who is willing to follow you around as you go to your job, to the supermarket, etc. and be ready in the car with her teet to suckle upon. My professional opinion is that you should STOP BEING A SUCKLING PIG AND QUIT VAPING FOR GOOOD!



Chapter 7:
The First and Only Step:Step One

My extremely simple one step program is easy as pie. The one step program only features several sub-steps. Once you complete each of these sub-steps, and thereby complete the one step, you will be vape free, guaranteed. The sub-steps are as follows:

Sub-Step 1A:

Get rid of ALL vape devices around you. This includes atomizers, wicks, coils and even any vape juice. Some people who are quitting vaping try to throw away everything but the juice, and desperately attempt to either free base or drink it in a bad bout of withdrawal. Don’t let this happen to you. Get rid of it… ALL…NOW!

Sub-Step 1B:

End all relationships with vape users. It doesn’t matter if they are your lover, your friend, your family member. If they are vaping they are killing themselves and therefore they don’t value their relationship to you anyway. You are too good for them. Cut off all contact immediately. You don’t need to be burdened with the toxicity that these ne’er-do-wells most certainly emanate. If you live within walking distance of a vapor shop or a head shop that sells e-juice you must MOVE. Do not let yourself go down this road again because of controllable external stimuli.

Sub-Step 1C:

This is the most important sub-step of all and following it correctly will guarantee a vape-free lifestyle. And it couldn’t be easier. Instead of lugging around your battery, your mod, your juices, your endless streams of wicks and coils, simplify things and START SMOKING CIGARETTES! It’s that easy! While they can be more expensive, the high is much more rewarding and doing it is endless fun. People who smoke are cool, and people who vape are not! There couldn’t more easy, fun and effective tool! Follow this sub-step and buy a pack of your favorite cigs. Be they Marlboro, Camel or Newport, smoking cigarettes is the ultimate solution for quitting vaping.


Chapter 8:
Staying off the E-Pen for Life

If you follow my one-step program and all of its substeps, you will never desire a puff on that nefarious e-pen again. But do follow all of the instructions. And most importantly, HAVE NO FEAR! Vaping is something that you can quit. In my four months of counseling I have successfully cured dozens of vaping addicts with my solution. So throw away your mod, throw away your battery, light up a cigarette, and finally, live your life again!

Step by Step Instructions to Sound like Tom Morello (on a financial plan)

Rap Rock Legend

Tom Morello...
INGLEWOOD, CA – DECEMBER 10: Guitar player Tom Morello of Rage Against the Machine performs onstage during KROQ Almost Acoustic Christmas at The Forum on December 10, 2016 in Inglewood, California. (Photo by Scott Dudelson/WireImage)

Tom Morello is an old and bald guitarist who as of now plays with Prophets of Rage, yet once played for Rage Against the Machine, when he was youthful (yet bald). He looks cool and wears cool caps that have political or shrewd platitudes on them. His great and imaginative music is crazy and shaking. He made rap rock combination music that prompted the ascent of Limpbizkit, Korn and others. He has affected ages of guitarists and put the Digitech Whammy pedal on the map. Be that as it may, how might you accomplish his mark guitar tone on a financial plan? Read on to discover!

Limp Bizkit...

Guitar

Initial step to seeming like Tom Morello is to get a decent guitar for the activity. Most guitars sound the same however there are two primary kind which he utilizes; Gibson and Ibanez, despite the fact that he has been known to play a Fender occasionally.

The shared factor between the greater part of his guitars is that they are electric rock guitars. You don’t have to go for anything costly. They all sound essentially the same. Why not try go for the Blue Davison Guitar? It has a decent rock tone and is useful for making that sort of music. It likewise accompanies a little amp and a sack to convey the guitar in, so it won’t break when you drop it. With the little amp, you won’t have to squander your cash on purchasing a major costly one. At such a shabby reasonable rate, how could pass it up?

Pedals

DigiTech Whammy

Tom Morello utilize numerous pedals in his apparatus. While he has some exceptionally cool boutique things on his board, there’s no reason for squandering your cash on these items. They will be costly and awkward to bear since they are substantial.

We suggest the (Red) Whammy from DigiTech. It replaces a simple whammy bar and is significantly more adaptable and intense. It is the ideal beginning stage for the Tom Morello sound. What’s more, at under $200, that is an incredible deal. Numerous other pedals can cost $300 and up on the present market. So why not go easy on the wallet and utilize the (Red) Whammy from DigiTech to accomplish those Tom Morello tones? In any case, hurry in light of the fact that DigiTech never again will make the Whammy, since they were purchased by Harman (a Samsung organization).

Conclusion  

It is difficult to seem like Tom Morello. He’s a Grammy Awards winning craftsman, so you know it’s hard to get his sound. Be that as it may, utilizing this guide and the rigging in here it will be a considerable measure simpler at this point.